Friday, July 8, 2011

Deb is Cranky

This is a bad news/good news sitch (as in situation, in case you aren't familiar with abbreviations that didn't make it onto this blog post).

Bad News: Things Deb DOESN'T LOVE

1) The motion sensors in my office

Seriously. Who thought it would be a good idea to put a motion sensor into an office where ONE PERSON SITS AT A DESK ALL DAY TYPING?

2) My intimacy bras

Yes, they make my boobs look great. But I DREAD putting them on in the morning because they are so freaking uncomfortable. If I wanted to be stabbed constantly by stays or rubbed raw by lace I would wear a corset. And hopefully if I was wearing a corset I would be doing something more fun than SITTING AT MY DESK WAVING MY ARMS TRYING TO GET THE FREAKING MOTION SENSOR TO NOTICE I AM HERE.

3) My schedule

I want to quit everything. When I look at my calendar for the month of July I want to vomit all over myself. I would like to take a vacation for a minimum of 6 weeks. I would like to spend those 6 weeks at a beach resort, drinking cold, sparkling water and getting a tan. I would also like my Besties to accompany me. I would like there to never be inclement weather at said beach resort. Only sunshine.The End.

Good News: Things Deb DOES, in fact, LOVE

1) My Polka Dot sweater

I look like a Dalmatian. I wish people would pet me.

2) Weekends

Not going to work is the balls.

3) Sleeping in

Not that I would know as I NEVER GET TO DO IT.


I would like to end on the following note:


1 comment:

  1. Deb, you should write a new musical called Deb: Turn Off The Dark.